"The Black Perception"

    Haven't blogged in a while but I've finally found a great topic to cover...So I was recently asked by a young lady if "a man's relationship with his mother is reflected by how he treats women"? This was a great question simply because one could elaborate about this on different levels. I replied back this: "I think that in most cases it does matter because for the most part, men hold there mom to the highest standard and want their wife to be a spitting image or reflection of what their mom is. In some cases men treat women bad because of the lack of presence and love that they received from their Mom as an adolescent youth. Subsequently, this sort of neglect becomes a dominating factor on how they treat, care for, and view women"..She then asked "if he treats his mom with the utmost respect then he would treat women the same way"? I thought this second part of her question was rather interesting because it seemed as if she understood that just because you love your Mom,  you could have a totally different view of how you look at women. 


I then replied back to the second part of her question by saying this "I would hope so lol But I also believe that can be a nature vs nurture issuing considering the fact that some men who come from good homes also fall short in respecting a woman's mind and temple and look at them as sexual objects instead of queens. The media and the false portrayal of black beauty in general plays a part in its self".
I highlighted nature vs nurture specifically to note that men (as well as women) tend to drift off in a lustful abyss and choose to"soil their royal oats", subsequently abandoning all realms of sanity and respect for women

A great question would be, where does all this stem from? I say the media and its false portrayal of Black Love and relationships has a lot to do with it. It seems like every internet site (WSHH) or television channel I come across I see a women missing an article of clothing; and its depressing because instead of being proactive and negating from the stereotypes, we as a people embrace them (women wearing low cut shorts and men sagging their pants etc). Now I will say this, Women should be allowed to wear what they want instead of always worrying about being hounded by old & young pervs...Now I'm not perfect (don't judge me) but if I see a young lady with a nice shape I admire from a far, and I don't ponder long. Plain and simple. lol....
I recently watched a mini documentary entitled "Video Vixen Summit" (YouTube if you haven't seen it) and a good number of the young women were speaking about how they were employed prior to the video shoots they were in and how they were using videos to make themselves more marketable. The only part I disagreed on was that although they were doing this for their "greater good" the black community (Particularly Black Women) were taking a lot of heat from it. In addition, this cancer of "Video Vixionism" (I just made that word up) stems back to the original video vixen, which is "Sarah Baartman"(whom was a very beautiful Black Woman that was dehumanized; Google her), And this woman is a prime example of how Black Women have been stereotyped since the beginning of time....
  
   But I only mention this because the media's false perception of Black Women and Black Love are wrong for the most part. Whenever you read or watch a movie about Love in other cultures its so overly romantic and passionate; such as "The Notebook" (Love that movie btw) and other movies. But when you reference Black Love its either a no good Black Man in a Tyler Perry Movie, or a Sistah Souljah book (no offense to her). 
Overall, I think men(BLACK MEN ESPECIALLY) need to look past the superficiality of the false perception of Love and respect Women (especially Black Women) receive in the media, and abandon that narcissistic enigma of treating their Mothers good but treating other women bad...


So, Do you think Black men mirror their relationship with their mother's parallel to the way they view Women in general?